Solidarity and what happens when you don't have it

So after my post of last week, the very next day in fact, I caught up with a professional acquaintance for a coffee. I have met this lady only once or twice, face to face, but I spoke to her just before Christmas (about a job offer, actually, but that's a story for another day) and she suggested we catch up for a coffee in the new year.

As an aside, this is the sort of stuff that makes me feel really vulnerable. Even though it was her idea to have a coffee and swap notes, I cycled through some interesting feelings when I texted her - I actually put it off for days. What if she thinks I am an idiot? What if she was only offering to have coffee to be nice? What if I am annoying her? This happens to me a lot.

It was a timely follow on to this post. When we caught up with spoke about a bunch of issues in our industry, gossiped about who had moved where and who had quit what. But, inevitably, we got to the issue of how we struggle with certain perceptions / issues in the work place as as woman.

The same questions I had asked myself - how many times do I have to fight? Haven't I proven myself enough by now for you to respect me without me having to stamp my feet? If I get angry and pull you into line, am I going to perceived as emotional? - were the same ones she was grappling with, and nowhere nearer to drawing a conclusion than I was.

So of course, we both commented that it was fantastic to know that someone else was going through these issues, that there was someone else out there that we could feel solidarity with, knowing that these challenges arise for most people. A wonderful feeling, in many respects, however, it left me with a slightly niggling feeling - in the two hours that we caught up, we shared swapped war tales of some pretty untoward treatment - but, you know, at least we had someone who could offer a sympathetic ear and knew how fucked up this kind of behaviour is.

It disturbed me - not because we both had some stories (concerning as that is), but because I thought of all the other people (not just women) who are marginalised in the workplace  - for their gender, religion, race, sexual preference, whatever - who don't have anyone to turn to, no one to compare notes with ? I know that there are lots of resources in Australia that promote workplace fairness in a bunch of ways - and I'm thankful for that - but what about people who don't even realise that they are being unfairly exploited or treated, and may not necessarily be aware of the agencies out there to provide assistance? This article immediately sprung to my mind:

http://www.theage.com.au/victoria/fair-work-investigates-claims-massage-parlour-fined-staff-for-running-late-20150119-12t48j.html

Pretty damning, right? Imagine being fined $100 for showing up late to work, and what's more, thinking that this is a either 1) a perfectly legitimate work place practice or 2) pretty unfair, but I can't say anything or I'll lose my job.

It infuriates me to think that this sort of thing is happening in Australia.